All aboard a brand-new episode of Lovett or Leave It, setting sail from Los Angeles’s beautiful Dynasty Typewriter theater. A vacationing tourist (Janet Varney) gives us the low down on a festively dystopian new cruise ship. Jared Goldstein helps us pack our bags with the most out-of-pocket celebrity endorsements. Tien Tran joins us for an early bird dinner on the gerontocracy deck, and Emily St. James reviews our on-board entertainment. We close out the show with the one thing you don’t really need on a ship: a wheel. Fortunately, this one is chock full of rants. See you at the sundae bar, if you have any room left!

For a closed-captioned version of this episode, click here. For a transcript of this episode, please email transcripts@crooked.com and include the name of the podcast.