What A Day: McGruff The Crime DOGE | Crooked Media
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What A Day: McGruff The Crime DOGE

Ariana Phillips, 3, gives a hug to McGruff the Crime Dog, as Roanoke Police Academy recruit class 7237 watch in the background during National Night Out at Afton Garden Apartments in Roanoke, VA., on Tuesday, Aug. 2, 2016. (Erica Yoon/The Roanoke Times via AP)

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Ariana Phillips, 3, gives a hug to McGruff the Crime Dog, as Roanoke Police Academy recruit class 7237 watch in the background during National Night Out at Afton Garden Apartments in Roanoke, VA., on Tuesday, Aug. 2, 2016. (Erica Yoon/The Roanoke Times via AP)

BLAH & ORDER!

Donald Trump is bending American law enforcement to his own purposes — with unsettling implications for everyone.

  • Remember McGruff the Crime Dog? That tough-talking canine best known for his after-school specials in the 80s and 90s? The one with the catchphrase: “Take a Bite Out of Crime!” Well, McGruff may not be singing “Users are Losers” anymore, but his parent organization — the National Crime Prevention Council — has been trying to keep up with the times. It launched a $2 million program to raise awareness about fentanyl-laced pills a few years ago, as fentanyl overdoses among young people skyrocketed.
  • Welp, the Trump administration slashed that program, effectively firing McGruff in its spasm of willy-nilly cost cutting. It’s an ironic move from a president who talks a lot about reducing crime and drug addiction.
  • “I did not expect McGruff to get DOGEd,”  Sen. Mark Kelly (D-AZ) told NPR. “This president talks about fentanyl coming across the border all the time. And this fentanyl crisis is killing people in my state but across the country. We need tools to deal with this and one of those tools is a public education campaign.”
  • But the fate of this cartoon crime-fighter merely points to a broader, and much more troubling point: Trump is reorienting law enforcement around the country, including in ways that are a lot more unnerving than booting McGruff off the force.
  • Trump is attempting to supercharge ICE to carry out his vision of a sweeping immigration crackdown. The Department of Justice is eyeing his political enemies while he urges his officials to bring criminal charges. The department recently rattled off a new round of subpoenas for New York Attorney General Letitia James — including one relating to her successful civil fraud case against the president. Trump’s FBI is forcing out senior officials, reportedly because they wouldn’t turn over names of agents who investigated the January 6 riot. And that’s not all.

Just look at what’s happening in Washington D.C.

  • Trump has long dreamed of a D.C. takeover. He seems to see his chance, after Edward Coristine, a 19-year-old DOGE agent better known as “Big Balls,” got beat up in the capital’s streets this week in what police called an attempted carjacking. As a result, Trump decreed, federal agents will start patrolling the city’s streets, while he continues to threaten an outright takeover of the D.C. police force.
  • In reality, violent crime in the nation’s capital is at a 30-year low, and it’s trending down for the second year straight. It’s true that violent crime among minors is up this year (and that, apparently, is who attacked Coristine). But the city has already enacted curfews to curb the issue and created a new police unit that tackles juvenile crime. Does Trump care? No. Will he use this as a moment to grab more power? It’s very possible.
  • The bottom line is that Trump likes to play tough on crime… when it suits his interests. That means more federal force conducted by mysterious masked agents, more ridiculously named detention centers and prisons, more death penalty convictions, and less focus on programs that could actually prevent dangerous crimes and help victims.

In the meantime: So long for now, McGruff. At least, this time, DHS Secretary Kristi Noem had nothing to do with it.

"I did not expect McGruff to get DOGEd.” — Sen. Mark Kelly (D-AZ), on Trump cuts to a cartoon dog’s crime-fighting initiatives.

NEWS NEWS NEWS

Russian dictator Vladimir Putin told the Trump administration that he would end the war in Ukraine if he’s given the Donbas —a region in eastern Ukraine — as part of a sprawling proposal, according to the Wall Street Journal. That’s likely a nonstarter for Kyiv, and European officials aren’t keen on recognizing Moscow’s territorial gains, either.
Israel is facing international backlash after its security cabinet approved a plan to take over Gaza City, paving a wider takeover of the territory. In response, Germany, one of Israel’s closest allies, announced that it would stop sending weapons that could be used in Gaza to Israel. Reminder: House Speaker Mike Johnson led a delegation of GOP lawmakers to Israel this week and met with Netanyahu.
Scientists are bashing the Trump administration’s plans to “update” past national climate reports, which are considered the gold-standard for understanding global climate impacts. “This is exactly what Joseph Stalin did,” said climate scientist Michael Mann.
MAGA Godfather Steve Bannon is secretly plotting a run for president in 2028, according to the Daily Mail. Take anything you read in that tabloid with a grain of salt. But if there’s one constant in American politics, it’s that Bannon is always secretly plotting something.
Donald Trump Jr. posted a cartoon picture of his dad throwing a dildo from the White House roof onto the floor of a women’s basketball game. It’s a reference to both Trump’s recent viral stroll on the roof, and the hail of sex toys being thrown by disruptive idiots onto the court at  WNBA games lately. Typical Don Jr.: Weird, creepy, not funny, encouraging the worst people’s behavior. And he probably thinks he’s being hilarious.
Vice President JD Vance’s security team raised the level of an Ohio river last week so he could go kayaking for his 41st birthday. Vance’s spokesperson said the veep was unaware of the change, and that it was done for security purposes (so motorized watercraft could operate freely). Yeah, okay. Whatever floats your boat, JD!
Journalists are making fun of the Trump administration’s $50 million offer for information leading to the arrest of Venezuelan leader Nicolas Maduro. “He’s probably in Venezuela,” Semafor’s David Weigel tweeted. Washington Post reporter John Hudson joined in: “Where could he be?”

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